


This is not domestic bliss, this is crazy

by InterruptingMoose



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Adam swears so much that this merits a teen and up audience, And Michael has the giggles, Balthazar can't find any whiskey, Because Benny tickles him, Bobby just wants a drink, Bunny rabbits, Castiel wears a ducky jumper, Charlie is awesome, Chuck may have a concussion because Gabriel beat him with a spatula, Dean hides in his room, Dysfunctional Family, F/F, F/M, Family Bonding, Fluff and Crack, For the love of god and all things that are holy do not stand on Gabriel's floors, Gabriel is a crazy housewife, Gabriel is a housewife, Gabriel wants to give Sam a haircut, Gabriel wields a spatula, Gabriel yells at anyone dirtying his floors, Gen, He is over a millennia years old, He lives in the fridge, He shouldn't have stood on Gabriel's floors, His hair is his precious, His name is Plotonko, Lucifer is mad at Justin Bieber, M/M, Michael and Lucifer think Cas is a baby, Michael and Lucifer's Cassie is too young to play poker, Michael has too much jeans, Michael makes everyone fall during twister, Michael names them, Multi, Nicknames, Oops, Other, Pets?, Pictionary is banned, Plotonko the platypus, Poor Luci, Sam does not want a haircut, Sam kills a bunny rabbit, Sam refuses to get a hair cut, So is Jo, So is charades, Someone please stop me writing, There is a platypus, Very awkward positions in Twister, Why Did I Write This?, because he didn't catch him when he fell, do not take this seriously, everybody comes back to life, no swearing in front of their Cassie, so much tags
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-08-05
Updated: 2014-11-17
Packaged: 2018-02-11 23:21:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 5,164
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2086956
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/InterruptingMoose/pseuds/InterruptingMoose
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sam and Dean live in the bunker and then Cas appears and then two archangels who are meant to in the Cage and then Gabriel wields a spatula and I don't know what's wrong with me.<br/>Main point, Cas arrives and a whole lot of crap goes down.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Cas is not a baby

Sam was in the kitchen getting a soda when Castiel came running into the kitchen and crashed into him.

"Cas, what're you-" Sam was about to ask the blue eyed angel why he was at the bunker but Castiel cut him off.

"You have to help me!" Castiel pleaded, looking absolutely terrified. He gripped the front of Sam's shirt, shaking him furiously. 

"What's wrong?" Sam asked, reaching for his gun.

"They're coming for me." Castiel said in a frightened whisper.

"Who are coming for-" Sam was cut off… again.

"CASTIEL!" He heard someone yell in a sickly sweet voice. "WHERE ARE YOU?"

Castiel's eyes widened in horror and he hid behind Sam, occasionally peeking around the moose's side. "They're here." He whispered, then hid.

That's it, Sam thought. No one hurts my brother's boyfriend (even if Dean and Cas don't know that yet) and gets away with it. He readied his gun and aimed at the door.

The door slammed open to reveal-

"Lucifer! Michael!" Sam asked, shocked. "I thought you were in the cage!"

The two archangels smiled at him. "We were, silly." Lucifer said optimistically, beaming at him. "And now we're out!"

"And what are you doing here?" Sam asked, suspiciously.

"Looking for our Cassie, of course!" Michael said in an equally optimistic tone. Sam felt Castiel's grip tighten on his shirt.

"Your Cassie?" Sam raised an eyebrow and Michael and Lucifer nodded.

"Now, Cassie, don't hide behind the nice man. Come out." Lucifer said, like a stern mother. Castiel's head peaked out from behind Sam.

"No." He glared at them before hiding behind Sam.

"Castiel." Michael warned, his hands on his hips. Castiel reluctantly stepped out from behind Sam, muttering a series of curse words in Enochian.

"Language, young man!" Lucifer scolded him.

"WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO MY KITCHEN?" A girly shriek came from behind them. Sam spun round and saw a fuming Gabriel.

"Gabriel!" Sam looked even more shocked and confused.

"Don't you 'Gabriel' me, mister!" Gabriel scolded him. He snapped his fingers and a flowery apron appeared around his waist as well as pink rubber gloves. "Out! Out of my kitchen! I simply won't have it!"

"Your kitchen-" Sam began.

"Out! Oh, look at all of these papers! Why are you boys so messy?" Gabriel started picking up the rubbish, while ushering Moose, Castiel and the two archangels out of the room.

"And, Samuel Winchester! May God have mercy on you if I find that room of yours a mess!" Gabriel waved a threatening finger at the younger Winchester. Sam looked confused before he sprinted to his room to clean it until it was squeaky clean.

"Sam! You can't leave me!" Castiel yelled after him. "Get your ass back here and save me!"

"Castiel, what have we told you about using bad language?" Lucifer sighed and shook his head. "Now, let's get you out of those horrible clothes and into something more new and stylish!"

"No. No! I'm okay! I like my clothes." Castiel walked backwards until he slammed into the wall. "Michael, Lucifer, no."

Michael and Lucifer rounded on him with those stupid smiles on their stupidly handsome faces.

……………

Dean was at the supermarket to do some shopping. There were no hunts this week and that meant that he had nothing to do.

After picking up a few necessities he got in his Impala and drove back to the bunker.

When Dean opened the door, there are several things he did not expect.

One, he did not expect to see Gabriel in a frilly flowery apron and pink gloves chasing Sam with a spatula.

Two, he did not expect to Michael and Lucifer. More importantly, he did expect to see Michael and Lucifer trying to force Castiel to eat food by saying: "Open up, Cassie, here comes the airplane!"

He did also not expect to see his angel wearing a ducky jumper.

"Samuel! Get back here!" Gabriel called after the hunter. "You will get rid of that ridiculous haircut!"

"No!" Sam yelled, covering his hair to protect it.

"Get back here, young man!" Gabriel yelled, waving his spatula threateningly.

"Here comes the airplane! Open wide, Cassie!" Michael said, making the spoon fly towards Castiel. Castiel folded his arms over his chest and kept his mouth firmly shut.

"Don't be like that, Cassie." Lucifer said and then tickled Castiel, making him laugh. Michael quickly shoved the spoon in Castiel's mouth. Castiel chewed on the food and swallowed and sent death glares towards the archangels.

"WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?" Dean yelled.

Lucifer quickly covered Castiel's ears and he and Michael glared at the older hunter. "No swearing in front of the child!" He scolded.

"I AM A OVER MILLENNIA YEAR OLD!" Castiel yelled.

"Way to go Dean! You've upset my Cassie!" Michael scolded, pulling Castiel a bone crushing hug, muffling out all of Castiel's yells. "Shh." Michael ran a hand through Castiel's dark locks.

"WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING BRINGING THOSE MUDDY SHOES INTO MY HOME!" Gabriel screeched, pointing his spatula at Dean.

Dean looked at Gabriel, and without a moments thought, sprinted to his room, locking the door.

"Hello, boys!" He heard a familiar British accent.

"Do you have any whiskey?" He heard another familiar British accent.

"What are you idjits doing?"

"I was stuck in the cage with those two, and Sam left me!"

"YOU ARE DRAGGING DIRT ALL OVER MY FLOORS!"


	2. Sam does not want a haircut

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, I actually didn't expect such a positive response on that last story. That was just me being well… me.

"DID YOU JUST DROP CRUMBS ON MY SOFA?" Gabriel shrieked at the King of Hell.

"Umm…" Crowley mumbled, subtly trying to brush the crumbs off of the sofa and into his hands. "No?"

"LIAR! I CAN SEE THEM!" Gabriel screamed.

"I'm sorry?" Crowley suggested weakly. 

"GO TO YOUR ROOM!" Gabriel pushed him off the sofa, with a mini vacuum in his hand.

"I don't have a room!" Crowley replied sulkily.

"Then go find one, and I'm going to inspect it in twenty minutes!" Gabriel declared. "If I so much as find a speck of dust in that…" He left the warning hanging.

Slowly, Crowley backed out of the living room and broke into a sprint to find a room.

"Castiel! What are you doing?" Michael asked, his hands on his hips. Castiel stood frozen with a tub if ice cream and a spoon halfway into his mouth.

"Eating ice cream." Castiel replied.

"Give me that!" Lucifer said and reached for the ice cream. 

"No." Castiel stepped out of his reach, his arms wrapped protectively around his ice cream.

"It's bad for you." Michael scolded. "It's probably already ruining your teeth and your immune system…" Michael rambled on.

"Where are Sam and Dean?" Castiel asked suddenly.

"Dean is locked in his room and Sam is in his room." Michael replied. Castiel gave a small nod and then, without warning, sprinted down the hallway and began banging on Dean's door.

"Let me in!" He pleaded. Dean quickly opened the door, dragged Castiel in and shut it again.

"Are you okay?" Dean asked as Castiel ripped off the ducky jumper. "What happened?"

"Michael and Lucifer treating me like a baby and Gabriel-" Castiel froze mid-sentence and a look of horror crossed his features. Something was wrong. He was missing something. "I dropped my -"

"MY FLOORS! WHAT HAPPENED TO MY FLOORS! MY BEAUTIFUL CLEAN FLOORS! WHO DID THIS?" Gabriel scream was so loud and high pitched that soon enough, only dogs would be able to hear it.

"Glue it! Glue the door shut!" Castiel said, pointing to the door. "I am never coming out of here."

……………

"Uh, Gabriel, what are you doing?" Balthazar asked as Gabriel walked across the kitchen holding a pair of scissors, a maniacal look on his face.

"Winchester Jumbo-Size is getting a haircut, whether he wants to or not." Gabriel said and Balthazar could hear his crazy laughter from down the hall.

"What the fuck is wrong with him?" Adam asked, being extra careful not to drop any crumbs on the - Gabriel's floor.

"I have no idea." Balthazar shrugged.

"Where's Lucifer and Michael?" Bobby asked, throwing the newspaper carelessly on the table.

"They were upset that Castiel had run off to Dean so they went shopping." Adam said.

"Do the archangels seem a little… bat-shit crazy to you?" Bobby asked, adjusting his cap.

"They'll be fine." Balthazar waved it off, rummaging through the cupboards for whiskey.

"WE'RE BACK!" Lucifer sang as he skipped into the kitchen with Michael, both carrying around ten shopping bags in each hand. "Ask us what we got!"

"What did you get?" Adam asked flatly.

"Well, if you insist, I got this new shirt." Lucifer said, pulling out a plaid shirt. "And I got Cassie this." He pulled out a huge teddy bear bee and held it up proudly. "He's gonna love it."

"Did you get any whiskey?" Balthazar asked hopefully.

"No." Michael shook his head. "But I got new jeans!" He showed them his new jeans, which were a little tight, but he got them in different colours.

The kitchen door opened and a redheads girl walked in and stopped. 

"Can someone tell me why there's some short dude wearing an apron chasing Sam with a pair of scissors?"


	3. Charlie is here

"Gabriel is trying to give Sam a haircut." Adam said. "Sam does not want a haircut."

"Oh." Charlie said and plopped down on the seat next to Bobby. "Where's Dean?"

"Hiding in his room with Cas." Bobby shrugged, opening a beer. 

"Why?" Charlie accepted the beer Bobby offered her.

"Do you think that they're…?" Balthazar smirked at the look of pure horror that crossed Michael and Lucifer's faces.

"No!" Michael yelled. "Our Cassie would never do that! He's too young!"

"He's millions of fucking years old." Adam said.

"No!" Lucifer protested. "He's just a baby!"

"No, he's a grown up that has sex." Adam smirked.

"NO!" Lucifer and Michael yelled, covering their ears. 

"Cassie has orgies in the future, too." Balthazar smirked.

"LALALALALALALALALALA!" Michael and Lucifer screamed, covering their ears and shaking their heads.

"That boy will be the death of me!" Gabriel muttered angrily, shaking the scissors that still hasn't met Sam's hair. "WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?" Gabriel yelled, pushing Bobby's feet off of the table and washing it furiously.

"Charlie's here." Bobby grumbled, glaring at the archangel.

"Who's Charlie?" Gabriel looked confused.

"I'm Charlie." The redhead in question raised her hand slowly.

Gabriel assessed her for a minute. "You are much too skinny!" He declared. "Wait here, and I'll making you something to eat."

"You know you could just zap food in." Balthazar pointed out.

"Don't sass me, boy!" Gabriel waved the wooden spoon in Balthazar's face. The blonde angel took several steps back. "No, back in my day you couldn't just 'zap' things in." Gabriel muttered as he chopped up some vegetables.

"Yes you could." Adam said and Gabriel whacked him in the head with a dish towel.

"Dinner will be ready soon." Gabriel declared. "Go get those good for nothing lazy…"

"Don't insult my baby!" Lucifer said. "Cassie is not good for nothing or lazy."

"Just go tell them that dinner is going to be ready soon." Gabriel glared at him.

Michael and Lucifer skipped out of the kitchen to put their bags in their room… once they found one, of course…

Crowley came in a few minutes later looking exhausted. He collapsed down on the chair next to Adam.

"What the fuck happened to you?" Adam chuckled.

"I found a room and I cleaned it." Crowley said, taking a drink of water.

"Dinner is going to be ready soon." Balthazar muttered from behind the newspaper he picked up.

"After dinner, I will be inspecting all of your rooms." Gabriel warned. "They better be clean or I will have you scrub all of the rooms clean with a toothbrush."

Everyone carefully shifted away from Gabriel. 

Sam, Dean and Castiel came into the kitchen a few minutes later. 

"Charlie!" Sam and Dean grinned and pulled the redhead into a bone crushing hug.

"What has you here?" Sam asked, letting her go.

"I don't know. I just appeared." Charlie shrugged.

"Please excuse me." Gabriel said and left the kitchen and everyone let out a sigh of relief.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO MY FLOORS?" 

"OMG! YOU'RE GABRIEL! ASDFGHJKL!"


	4. OMG! It's Becky!

"SAM!" Becky screamed and threw herself at the oversized human.

"NO FANGIRLING UNTIL AFTER DINNER!" Gabriel yelled, angrily chopping up onions and throwing them into the frying pan.

"Hi, Becky." Sam sighed, prying the girl from his body.

"Who's that?" Castiel asked Dean, nodding to Becky.

"Becky." Dean muttered, grimacing.

"OH MY GOD!" Becky screamed. "YOU'RE CASTIEL!" She launched herself at the angel.

"Get off of my angel!" Dean yelled, standing up and knocking his chair down.

Charlie pulled Becky off of Castiel, who looked absolutely petrified, and led her out of the room.

"Let's show you your new room." Charlie said, leading the crazy blonde out.

"But he's so dreamy." Becky said and stared longingly at Castiel and then at Sam.

"Yeah, I know." Charlie said and dragged her out.

"Are you okay, Cas?" Dean asked, pulling the angel to his feet.

"I think she licked me." Castiel rubbed his cheek.

"Who the fuck was that?" Adam asked, looking confused.

"That was Bec-" Sam began but was cut off by another scream.

"HANDS OFF MY MICHAEL!"

"OMFG! YOU'RE LUCIFER! AAAGGGHHHH!"

"AH! MICHAEL, SAVE ME!"

"C'MON, BECKY!"

"I LOVE YOU, LUCIFER!"

"WHO THE HELL ARE YOU?"

"What just happened?" Lucifer asked as he and Michael walked back into the kitchen.

"Castiel just got attacked." Crowley said.

"WHAT?" Lucifer and Michael screamed and were immediately at Castiel's sides.

"You're not hurt, are you?" Michael asked, assessing Castiel for any injuries.

"Do you have an ouchies, Cassie?" Lucifer asked.

"Don't worry! We won't let the mean lady hurt you ever again!" Michael assured him, pulling him into a hug.

"Yeah." Lucifer nodded, ruffling his hair.

""I AM OVER A MILLENNIA YEARS OLD!" Castiel yelled.

"He's probably just stressed out about the attack." Lucifer told Michael, who nodded in agreement.

"Wasn't Cassie wearing a tie?" Balthazar asked, raising an eyebrow.

Castiel felt his chest to see if his tie was there. 

It wasn't. 

Everyone exchanged glances and then all looked to the door where Becky had just been dragged out.

"I can't believe she licked you and stole your tie." Bobby said.

"Anyways, we got you a present, Cassie!" Michael said and Lucifer produced the huge teddy bear bee.

Castiel glared at them as they shoved the bee into his hands. "I am millions of years old, I do not need a teddy bear."

"Then give it back." Lucifer said.

"No." Castiel replied, hugging his bee protectively. "I'm mad at you two." Castiel said before stomping over and sitting in Dean's lap.

"DINNER IS READY!" Gabriel squealed excitedly. He filled the table with dishes of food and plates and drinks. Everyone made appreciative noises.

"CHARLIE! GET YOUR ASS IN HERE AND EAT!" Gabriel yelled.

"WILL I BRING BECKY?" She yelled back.

"YES!" Gabriel screamed, louder than everyone else's 'no'.

Charlie and Becky came in a few seconds later, and Charlie set Becky as far away from Castiel and Sam as possible.

Everyone began to eat but then they heard another voice come from the living room.

"I really need to stop drinking so much, maybe the visions wouldn't be so vivid."

Gabriel ran out of the kitchen, faster than humanly possible, with a mop in one hand and a spatula in the other.


	5. Age appropriate games for Cassie

"Ow! Ow! What the fu- Ow! Why are you hitting me with a spatula? Ow!"

"DO YOU THINK I CLEAN THESE FLOORS JUST SO YOU CAN STAND ALL OVER THEM?"

"I'm sorry?" 

"OH, YOU WILL BE IF YOU DON'T GET THAT SORRY ASS OF YOURS INTO THE KITCHEN AND OFF OF MY FLOOR!"

"Ow! I'm going! Ow! Damn, you're crazy!"

"WHAT THE HELL DID YOU JUST SAY, YOUNG MAN?"

"I like hazelnut!"

Chuck crashed through the door of the kitchen, rubbing his head. He was going to have a lot of new bruises in the morning.

"Hey, Chuck." Sam greeted the prophet.

"Why was I just beaten with a spatula by a man wearing a flowery apron?" Chuck asked, glancing cautiously at the door.

"That's Gabriel." Dean said. "The archangel."

"That doesn't really change the fact that he probably gave me a concussion with a spatula." Chuck grumbled, sitting down at the table. "Hey, Cas." He added, greeting the blue eyed angel.

"Hello, Chuck." Castiel replied, hugging his teddy bear bee.

"Everyone, this is Chuck." Sam introduced. "The prophet." He added when everyone gave him questioning looks.

"You look like a hobo." Lucifer said.

"You look like a- wait, who are you?" Chuck asked.

"Lucifer." Lucifer smirked at him.

"Oh." Chuck said, subtly shifting away from the Devil. "Do we always invite Satan to dinner?" He asked Dean.

"Nope." Dean said. "The archangels are a little... crazy. That's Michael." Dean pointed to the man sitting in Lucifer's lap, as if to prove his point.

"Oh." Chuck repeated. "Who's everyone else?" Chuck asked, looking around all of the table.

"That's Adam, Charlie, you know Becky, Bobby, Crowley, Balthazar and Gabriel's the one who beat you with a spatula." Dean said.

"RIGHT! THAT IS IT! NO MORE DIRTYING MY FLOORS OR I WILL USE YOUR FACE TO SCRUB THEM CLEAN!" Gabriel shrieked as he walked back into the kitchen and everyone moved as far away as possible from him.

"He's not serious, is he?" Chuck asked Sam. Sam only gave him a look to say, 'go stand on his floors and find out.' 

After dinner, everyone sat at the table, bored.

"How about we play poker?" Adam suggested.

"Cassie's too young to play poker." Lucifer said, shaking his.

"I'm older than most people at this table!" Castiel protested. 

"There will be no gambling under my roof." Gabriel said, cleaning the dishes.

"It's not your roof. It's our roof." Sam said, gesturing between Dean and himself. Gabriel glared at him. "We can share the roof." Sam said, backing away slightly.

"How about we play Twister?" Becky suggested.

"No, Cassie could get hurt." Michael said.

"Monopoly?" Charlie suggested.

"Too many people."

"Snakes and Ladders?"

"Too boring."

"Cluedo?" 

"How do you even play that game?"

"Pictionary?"

"Yeah, let's play Pictionary!"

...............

Pictionary was not a good idea.

"IT'S A FUCKING CAT!"

"NO, IT'S AN AIRPLANE!"

"IT'S OBVIOUSLY A HOUSE!"

"HOW IN HOLY HELL IS THAT A FUCKING HOUSE?"

"IT'S A MOOSE!"

"IT'S SAM!"

"HEY!"

"THAT IS THE FUCKING MOON!"

"THE MOON ISN'T SHAPED LIKE A SQUARE!"

"YOU DON'T KNOW THAT!"

"LET'S PLAY CHARADES!" 

"YEAH! CHARADES!"

...............

Charades was an even worse idea.

"IT'S A FUCKING CAT!"

"WHAT IS IT WITH YOU AND CATS?"

"CATS ARE AWESOME!"

"IT'S A MOOSE!"

"IT'S SAM!"

"WILL YOU STOP THAT!"

"IT'S HARRY POTTER!"

"EXPECTO PATRONUM!"

"FUCK UP!"

"TITANIC!"

"TO THE STARS JACK! OW! WHY'D YOU HIT ME?"

"IT'S A - Hey, who's that blonde chick?"

"Where the hell am I?"


	6. Guess who's back, back again. Jo Harvelle's back, tell a friend

A/N: Sometimes I like to think back and remember when my stories had sense and a plot. What the hell happened? This is kinda short, but I hope you enjoy!

"Jo?" Dean asked, staring at the confused blonde girl.

"Yeah?" Jo asked, raising an eyebrow. "Where am I?"

"The Men of Letters bunker." Sam replied.

"The what of whatters?" Jo asked, looking around.

"Men of Letters... our house... kind of." Dean said and Jo just accepted the answer.

"What're you guys doing?" She asked, looking at some of the angry faces.

"Playing charades." Lucifer replied, grinning. 

"Not anymore, we're not." Adam added. "You guys are fucking psychos."

"Can we play Twister?" Jo asked, looking hopeful.

"No." Everyone replied. 

...............

"Okay, Dean, left hand green." Bobby said, looking up from the spinny Twister thing.

Dean reached over and placed his left hand on green and came face to face with Castiel.

"Hi, Cas." He said, cheerily.

"Hello, Dean." Castiel replied, their noses almost touching.

"Okay, Lucifer, right foot pink." Bobby ordered and the archangel stretched over to the pink circle.

Since there was so many people, Michael and Lucifer created a bigger Twister mat with more coloured circles. The angels wanted to play extreme Twister, but that involved way more body parts.

They all did this while Gabriel danced around the room, dusting and wiping things until they sparkled.

"Okay, Sam, left foot orange." Bobby said and the ginormous moose put his foot on the orange circle, smirking because this was easier on him because he was the tallest.

"Jo, put your right hand on blue." Bobby said and the blonde groaned. She would have to stretch over Crowley and under Becky.

"Michael, do you regret wearing the right jeans?" Crowley asked the oldest archangel.

"I'm not complaining." Lucifer piped up from behind Michael, smirking.

"Be quiet, Lucifer." Michael said, but he was grinning and Lucifer's smirk grew.

In the middle of the game, everyone was in an awkward position. It was Jo right underneath Balthazar, who had Adam's crotch right in his face. Adam was bent with one leg over Sam and the other under Crowley and his face directly under Chuck's, who was above sitting above Becky. Becky was right next to Charlie, who had her cheek pressed against Castiel's cheek. Castiel had one arm looped over Dean's shoulders while Dean had his leg over Michael's back and Michael had Lucifer right in his face, nose to nose.

"How badly do you guys wanna win this?" Dean asked everyone.

"Badly." Everyone replied.

"Good, so no one will be bothered by the huge ass spider that's heading right towards us?" Dean asked, watching the eight legged creatures crawl towards them.

Everyone on the mat tensed up and slowly looked towards the spider.

"Don't move." Sam said. "If someone falls over, we're all going down."

Everyone remained still as the spider crawled towards them at an agonisingly slow pace.

"Someone kill it!" Dean hissed.

"We can't re- Oh, I know!" Adam said, remembering something. "GABRIEL! THERE'S A SPIDER ABOUT TO RUIN YOUR FLOORS!" He yelled into the kitchen and the archangel came sprinting out with his spatula in hand and a murderous, crazy look in his eyes.

"Where is it?" He asked, his honey eyes searching the floors for the creature. He spotted and walked over to it. He picked it up with a piece of paper and cup and brought it into the kitchen, the door closing behind him. The group watched the door carefully and they could've sworn they heard Gabriel pull out a hammer.

"Let's get back to the game?" Crowley suggested, diverting his gaze from the door.

"Okay... Michael, right hand red." Bobby said, his eyes avoiding the kitchen door.

"Are you having some kind of weird ass orgy?" A thick Cajun accent asked from the side of the room.

A/N: Can you guess who it is? Hope you enjoyed!

P.S. I'm think of starting a new Destiel fic and this is my plot... sort of:

The Novak family were a wealthy and well-liked family. Mr and Mrs Novak have four children, Michael, Lucifer, Gabriel and Anna. But, unbeknownst to the children, Mr and Mrs Novak have a very, very dark secret. 

And sometimes, the Novak children could swear that they could hear noises coming from the basement. 

But, when Gabriel invites his new friends over, Dean takes a wrong turn in the house and ends up in the basement, where he finds a locked door. 

Behind that door, lies a dark secret that has been kept hidden for seventeen years. And soon, dark secrets from the past begin to resurface… 

But there is a question that people have long since forgotten; What ever happened to little Castiel Novak?

Would anyone read something like that if I wrote it?


	7. Benny's theory

"Benny!" Dean cried out in surprise.

"Hello, Dean." Benny said, a grin in his face.

"What're you doing here?" Dean asked. "Let me guess, you just appeared?" He suggested and Benny nodded.

"Dean, left foot purple." Bobby said and Dean slipped his left foot between Sam and Balthazar and onto the purple circle.

"So, what happens if one of you need to sneeze?" Benny asked, walking around them, assessing the odd and complex positions.

"We'd probably all fall." Sam said. "Why?" He added, glancing suspiciously at the vampire.

Benny had an evil grin on his face as he picked up the duster Gabriel had left on the fireplace.

"What're you doing with that duster, Benny?" Dean asked suspiciously, looking at his friend.

"Nothing." Benny waved him off as he advanced towards them, the evil grin still in place.

Everyone watched carefully as Benny twisted the duster in his hand, a mischievous glint in his eyes.

"Let's see who is the most ticklish, shall we?" Benny asked and they all frantically shook their heads, or at least tried to, since some people had their faces in other people's crotches.

Bobby just sat back and chuckled at them.

Benny walked towards Dean first, and ran the duster along Dean's sides. Dean started shaking but he managed to contain himself and not fall over.

Benny nodded at Dean and began tickling Sam with the duster. Sam giggled and shook but he held on.

Benny stood back and carefully assessed all of them. Everyone tensed up when his gaze stopped and he locked eyes with someone.

"Someone please tell me that Michael isn't ticklish." Adam pleaded, as he was in the most complex position.

"Michael, whatever you do," Lucifer muttered. "Do not laugh or fall over."

They all watched very carefully as Benny practically skipped over to the oldest archangel and stopped in front of him.

"Hello." He said, the evil glint had returned to his eyes.

"Hello." Michael replied, staring up at the Cajun vampire.

"I don't know why," Benny began. "But I just had the feeling that you were the most ticklish out of everyone."

"What gave you that idea?" Michael asked.

"The way you kept avoiding my eye." Benny stated simply. "Let's test out that theory, shall we?" He asked with a smirk as he ran the duster along Michael's neck.

Michael began giggling and protesting at the same time, trying to move away from Benny. The archangel was shaking as he giggled and Benny smirked at him.

The tension in the room could have been sliced through with a knife. 

Benny ran the duster along Michael's sides and Michael started giggling again, causing him to shake and the others to tense up even more.

"Let's see what happens when we do this." Benny prodded Michael in the side with the duster and the archangel gave out and fell down, giggling uncontrollably as the others fell and crashed to the ground around him. 

There were multiple groans of pain (and every swear word possible from Adam) as everyone tried to detangle themselves from each other. It took around ten minutes for everyone to get out, and Benny had just taken to poking Michael repeatedly in the side with the duster while the archangel giggled uncontrollably, pleading for him to stop.

...............

Gabriel came running into the living room when he heard a crash. He had a frying pan with him and almost everyone backed away from him.

"What happened?" He demanded, in a high pitched scream.

"Lucifer threw the radio at the wall." Dean said, pointing at Lucifer as though he were a five year old.

"There was Justin Bieber song on, can you blame him?" Crowley asked.

"Oh, which song?" Becky asked, looking at the smashed radio.

"Fall, I think." Balthazar replied, looking at Lucifer sulking at the table.

"WHY DID YOU THROW THE RADIO AT MY WALL?" Gabriel shrieked, waving the frying pan around like a maniac.

"BECAUSE JUSTIN PROMISED HE'D CATCH ME WHEN I FELL AND HE DIDN'T!" Lucifer shrieked back before stomping into his and Michael's room and slamming the door.

"Someone wanna go talk to him?"

"So he can throw one of us at the wall? No thanks."

...............

Later that night, Dean was reading a newspaper with his feet propped up on the kitchen table. Michael had went to calm Lucifer down.

"Get your feet off of that table!" A female voice snapped, smacking him in the back of the head.


	8. The rabbits and the platypus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just a small chapter to try and develop on different relationships.

Michael skipped - no, Heaven's fiercest warrior does not skip, he... erm... marched with a rather joyful spring in his step into the garden in search of something to do.

On his courageous journey, he encountered Castiel, who was chasing a bee, giggling and hopping behind it.  
Michael spotted something in the corner of the garden and skip- marched with a rather joyful spring in his step towards the corner of the garden. 

There was a small litter of bunnies.  
He fell to his knees and picked up four or five at once and cooed at them all.

"I'm gonna call you General Flopsy, you're Private Furry, your name is Colonel Sniffles -" Michael dropped all of them and picked up the remaining one. "You would look so cute in a blue jacket. You. You are Peter Rabbit."

"AAAGGGHHHHH!" A high pitched scream came from the garden and Michael looked to see Crowley screaming and pointing towards the rabbits.

"KILL IT! KILL IT!" He screamed and Sam ran out and shot randomly.  
Another small bunny hopped towards his brothers and sisters.

"THERE'S ANOTHER ONE! KILL IT! KILL IT WITH FIRE!" Crowley screamed and ran back into the bunker.

Michael watched as General Flopsy's white fur began to turn red. The archangel dropped Peter Rabbit and picked up General Flopsy, cradling the small bunny to his chest.

"You monster." He sniffed, turning to Sam. 

Sam stood awkwardly rubbing the back of his neck. "I'm just gonna - yeah..." The Winchester walked and turned back into the house.

Castiel skipped, because yeah, he skips, over to Michael and sat down next to him.

"He was so young." Michael sniffed. Castiel slowly reached over and healed the rabbit.

Michael looked down at the rabbit and then at Castiel. "Way to ruin the moment, Cassie."

...............

Adam opened the fridge to get a beer and let out a rather girly shriek and slammed the door shut.

Gabriel looked up from his bowl of Lucky Charms and chocolate milk and raised an eyebrow.

"What is that in the fridge?" Adam asked, eyes wide.

"Oh, that's Plotonko." Gabriel grinned. "He's my platypus."

"WHY IS A PLATYPUS IN THE FRIDGE?" Adam yelled.

Gabriel pouted and opened the fridge to retrieve Plotonko. He cuddled the platypus to his chest, and he wore a heartbreaking pout. "He likes it in the fridge." Gabriel mumbled, sniffing.

"No, Gabe, don't cry. Please don't cry." Adam pleaded.

"Can Plotonko stay in the fridge?" Gabriel asked, eyes watery.

"He can stay wherever the hell he wants." Adam sighed.

"He wants you to hold him." Gabriel said, forcing the platypus into Adam's arms.

Adam held the weird creature and Gabriel beamed.

"Love you, Addie-Waddie." Gabriel said, wrapping his arms around Adam and snuggling him.

"Love you too, Gabe." Adam sighed.


End file.
